calm down and thank God

Everybody from the ninnies on the nightly news to your annoying neighbor Gladys needs to calm the heck down. We are not in Great Depression II. Don't be a Peggy Noonan. This morning when you went to take your bath or shower did you go to your bathroom or did you make your way to the river? Did you flush a toilet today or do you need to empty your chamber pot tonight? Do you have a refrigerator or does your kid have to go the snow covered root cellar? Do you have a place to live? I'm not asking if it's an overpriced mini mansion that cost far more than it's worth. Do you have a safe, clean place to live or is the tribe next door a constant threat?

When your daughter gets her first period are you planning on selling her off to the highest bidder? When you get sick do you go to a doctor or does your husband kill a goat as payment to the local witch doctor? If you miscarry will your husband comfort you or will he kill you? Did your 10 year son go to football practice after school or is he working the evening shift at the rug factory? Is your teenager lying on the couch eating Oreos or is she following (not too closely!) behind an elephant to gather its manure to sell as fuel in the market?

We are the luckiest most spoiled, whiny people in the world. We, and England have obese poor people. Our rich and middle class have so much leisure time that they make up false illnesses for themselves and their children. We can afford to take care of the foolish, selfish and lazy with welfare payments. We give women apartments if they get pregnant out of wedlock.

Yes, things are going to be painful for a while and yes, people have lost jobs and houses but damn, we all need a reality check.